Tapeinoterois

“Χαλεπὸν δ’ ἐρῶ σοι καὶ ἄλλο πάθημα, ὦ Σιμωνίδη, τῶν τυράννων. γιγνώσκουσι μὲν γὰρ οὐδὲν ἧττον τῶν ἰδιωτῶν τοὺς ἀλκίμους τε καὶ σοφοὺς καὶ δικαίους. τούτους δ’ ἀντὶ τοῦ ἄγασθαι φοβοῦνται, τοὺς μὲν ἀνδρείους, μή τι τολμήσωσι τῆς ἐλευθερίας ἕνεκεν, τοὺς δὲ σοφούς, μή τι μηχανήσωνται, τοὺς δὲ δικαίους, μὴ ἐπιθυμήσῃ τὸ πλῆθος ὑπ’ αὐτῶν προστατεῖσθαι. ὅταν δὲ τοὺς τοιούτους διὰ τὸν φόβον ὑπεξαιρῶνται, τίνες ἄλλοι αὐτοῖς καταλείπονται χρῆσθαι ἀλλ’ ἢ οἱ ἄδικοί τε καὶ ἀκρατεῖς καὶ ἀνδραποδώδεις; οἱ μὲν ἄδικοι πιστευόμενοι, διότι φοβοῦνται ὥσπερ οἱ τύραννοι τὰς πόλεις μήποτε ἐλεύθεραι γενόμεναι ἐγκρατεῖς αὐτῶν γένωνται, οἱ δ’ ἀκρατεῖς τῆς εἰς τὸ παρὸν ἐξουσίας ἕνεκα, οἱ δ’ ἀνδραποδώδεις, διότι οὐδ’ αὐτοὶ ἀξιοῦσιν ἐλεύθεροι εἶναι. χαλεπὸν οὖν καὶ τοῦτο τὸ πάθημα ἔμοιγε δοκεῖ εἶναι, τὸ ἄλλους μὲν ἡγεῖσθαι ἀγαθοὺς ἄνδρας, ἄλλοις δὲ χρῆσθαι ἀναγκάζεσθαι. ἔτι δὲ φιλόπολιν μὲν ἀνάγκη καὶ τὸν τύραννον εἶναι· ἄνευ γὰρ τῆς πόλεως οὔτ’ ἂν σῴζεσθαι δύναιτο οὔτ’ εὐδαιμονεῖν· ἡ δὲ τυραννὶς ἀναγκάζει καὶ ταῖς ἑαυτῶν πατρίσιν ἐνοχλεῖν. οὔτε γὰρ ἀλκίμους οὔτ’ εὐόπλους χαίρουσι τοὺς πολίτας παρασκευάζοντες, ἀλλὰ τοὺς ξένους δεινοτέρους τῶν πολιτῶν ποιοῦντες ἥδονται μᾶλλον καὶ τούτοις χρῶνται δορυφόροις. ἀλλὰ μὴν οὐδ’ ἂν εὐετηριῶν γενομένων ἀφθονία τῶν ἀγαθῶν γίγνηται, οὐδὲ τότε συγχαίρει ὁ τύραννος. ἐνδεεστέροις γὰρ οὖσι ταπεινοτέροις αὐτοῖς οἴονται χρῆσθαι.”
(Xenophon, Hiero 5)

“I will tell you of another harsh affliction, Simonides, which the tyrants have. For although they are acquainted with the decent, the wise, and the just, no less than private men [the tyrants] fea rather than admire them. They fear the brave because they might dare something for the sake of freedom; the wise, because they might contrive something; and the just, because the multitude might desire to be ruled by them. When, because of their fear, they do away secretly with such men, who is left for them to use save the unjust, the incontinent, and the slavish? The unjust are trusted because they are afraid, just as the tyrants are, that some day the cities, becoming free, will become their masters. The incontinent are trusted because they are at liberty for the present, and the slavish because not even they deem themselves worthy to be free. This affliction, then, seems harsh to me: to think some men are good, and yet to be compelled to make use of the others. Moreover, the tyrant also is compelled to be a lover of the city; for without the city he would not be able either to preserve himself or to be happy. Yet tyranny compels to give trouble to even their own fatherlands. For they do not rejoice in making the citizens either brave or well-armed. Rather they take pleasure in making strangers more formidable than the citizens, and these strangers they use as bodyguards. Furthermore, when good seasons come and there is an abundance of good things, not even then does the tyrant rejoice with them. For [tyrants] think that as men are more in want, they are more submissive for being used.” (tr. Marvin Kendrick & Seth Bernardete)

Axiotheatoi

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Εὐθὺς μὲν οὖν ἐννοήσας τις τὰ γιγνόμενα ἡγήσατ’ ἂν φύσει βασιλικόν τι κάλλος εἶναι, ἄλλως τε καὶ ἂν μετ’ αἰδοῦς καὶ σωφροσύνης, καθάπερ Αὐτόλυκος τότε, κεκτῆταί τις αὐτό. πρῶτον μὲν γάρ, ὥσπερ ὅταν φέγγος τι ἐν νυκτὶ φανῇ, πάντων προσάγεται τὰ ὄμματα, οὕτω καὶ τότε τοῦ Αὐτολύκου τὸ κάλλος πάντων εἷλκε τὰς ὄψεις πρὸς αὐτόν· ἔπειτα τῶν ὁρώντων οὐδεὶς οὐκ ἔπασχέ τι τὴν ψυχὴν ὑπ’ ἐκείνου. οἱ μέν γε σιωπηρότεροι ἐγίγνοντο, οἱ δὲ καὶ ἐσχηματίζοντό πως. πάντες μὲν οὖν οἱ ἐκ θεῶν του κατεχόμενοι ἀξιοθέατοι δοκοῦσιν εἶναι· ἀλλ’ οἱ μὲν ἐξ ἄλλων πρὸς τὸ γοργότεροί τε ὁρᾶσθαι καὶ φοβερώτερον φθέγγεσθαι καὶ σφοδρότεροι εἶναι φέρονται, οἱ δ’ ὑπὸ τοῦ σώφρονος ἔρωτος ἔνθεοι τά τε ὄμματα φιλοφρονεστέρως ἔχουσι καὶ τὴν φωνὴν πρᾳοτέραν ποιοῦνται καὶ τὰ σχήματα εἰς τὸ ἐλευθεριώτερον ἄγουσιν. ἃ δὴ καὶ Καλλίας τότε διὰ τὸν ἔρωτα πράττων ἀξιοθέατος ἦν τοῖς τετελεσμένοις τούτῳ τῷ θεῷ.
(Xenophon, Symp. 1.8-10)

A person who took note of what happened would have come at once to the conclusion that beauty is something naturally regal, especially when, as in the present case of Autolycus, its possessor joins with it modesty and self-control. For in the first place, just as the sudden glow of a light at night draws all eyes to itself, so now the beauty of Autolycus compelled everyone to look at him. And second, there was not one of the onlookers who did not feel his soul stirred by the boy; some of them grew quieter than before, others even assumed some kind of a pose. Now it is true that all who are possessed by any kind of the gods seem well worth gazing at; but whereas in the case of other gods they have a tendency to look bugeyed, making terrifying sounds, and behave more vehemently, those who are inspired by chaste Eros have a more affectionate look, make their voices more gentle, and carry themselves in a way most befitting free men. Such was the demeanor of Callias at this time under the influence of Eros; and therefore he was an object well worth the gaze of those initiated into the worship of this god. (tr. Edgar Cardew Marchant & Otis Johnson Todd, revised by Jeffrey Henderson)

Koinōnoumen

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The Piraeus

Ἀπέθανον δ’ ἐνταῦθα τῶν μὲν τριάκοντα Κριτίας τε καὶ Ἱππόμαχος, τῶν δὲ ἐν Πειραιεῖ δέκα ἀρχόντων Χαρμίδης ὁ Γλαύκωνος, τῶν δ’ ἄλλων περὶ ἑβδομήκοντα. καὶ τὰ μὲν ὅπλα ἔλαβον, τοὺς δὲ χιτῶνας οὐδενὸς τῶν πολιτῶν ἐσκύλευσαν. ἐπεὶ δὲ τοῦτο ἐγένετο καὶ τοὺς νεκροὺς ὑποσπόνδους ἀπεδίδοσαν, προσιόντες ἀλλήλοις πολλοὶ διελέγοντο. Κλεόκριτος δὲ ὁ τῶν μυστῶν κῆρυξ, μάλ’ εὔφωνος ὤν, κατασιωπησάμενος ἔλεξεν· “ἄνδρες πολῖται, τί ἡμᾶς ἐξελαύνετε; τί ἀποκτεῖναι βούλεσθε; ἡμεῖς γὰρ ὑμᾶς κακὸν μὲν οὐδὲν πώποτε ἐποιήσαμεν, μετεσχήκαμεν δὲ ὑμῖν καὶ ἱερῶν τῶν σεμνοτάτων καὶ θυσιῶν καὶ ἑορτῶν τῶν καλλίστων καὶ συγχορευταὶ καὶ συμφοιτηταὶ γεγενήμεθα καὶ συστρατιῶται, καὶ πολλὰ μεθ’ ὑμῶν κεκινδυνεύκαμεν καὶ κατὰ γῆν καὶ κατὰ θάλατταν ὑπὲρ τῆς κοινῆς ἀμφοτέρων ἡμῶν σωτηρίας τε καὶ ἐλευθερίας. πρὸς θεῶν πατρῴων καὶ μητρῴων καὶ συγγενείας καὶ κηδεστίας καὶ ἑταιρίας, πάντων γὰρ τούτων πολλοὶ κοινωνοῦμεν ἀλλήλοις, αἰδούμενοι καὶ θεοὺς καὶ ἀνθρώπους παύσασθε ἁμαρτάνοντες εἰς τὴν πατρίδα, καὶ μὴ πείθεσθε τοῖς ἀνοσιωτάτοις τριάκοντα, οἳ ἰδίων κερδέων ἕνεκα ὀλίγου δεῖν πλείους ἀπεκτόνασιν Ἀθηναίων ἐν ὀκτὼ μησὶν ἢ πάντες Πελοποννήσιοι δέκα ἔτη πολεμοῦντες. ἐξὸν δ’ ἡμῖν ἐν εἰρήνῃ πολιτεύεσθαι, οὗτοι τὸν πάντων αἴσχιστόν τε καὶ χαλεπώτατον καὶ ἀνοσιώτατον καὶ ἔχθιστον καὶ θεοῖς καὶ ἀνθρώποις πόλεμον ἡμῖν πρὸς ἀλλήλους παρέχουσιν. ἀλλ’ εὖ γε μέντοι ἐπίστασθε ὅτι καὶ τῶν νῦν ὑφ’ ἡμῶν ἀποθανόντων οὐ μόνον ὑμεῖς ἀλλὰ καὶ ἡμεῖς ἔστιν οὓς πολλὰ κατεδακρύσαμεν.” ὁ μὲν τοιαῦτα ἔλεγεν· οἱ δὲ λοιποὶ ἄρχοντες καὶ διὰ τὸ τοιαῦτα προσακούειν τοὺς μεθ’ ἑαυτῶν ἀπήγαγον εἰς τὸ ἄστυ.
(Xenophon, Hell. 2.4.19-22)

Of the Thirty, Kritias and Hippomachos were killed, and of the Ten who ruled in the Peiraieus, Charmides son of Glaucon and about seventy others also died. They gathered up the arms of the dead men but did not remove the tunic of a single citizen. When this had been completed and they were giving back the dead under truce, many of the men approached one another and began to speak together. Kleokritos, the herald of the Mystery Initiates and a man with an especially beautifull voice, called for silence and then spoke: “Fellow citizens, why do you drive us out? Why do you wish to put us to death? For we have done you no wrong ever, and we have shared with you the most solemn sacred rites and sacrifices and the most beautiful festivals; we men from both sides have joined in dances together, gone to school together, served as soldiers together; we have endured many dangers in common with you by land and by sea, for our common safety and our common freedom. In the name of the gods of our fathers and our mothers, in the name of our common ancestry, our links through marriage and our bonds of friendship—in the name of all these things, which so many of us share with one another—respect the gods and men and cease from doing wrong to your country. Do not obey the Thirty, the unholiest of men, who for their own gain almost killed more Athenians in eight months than the Peloponnesians killed in ten years of war. Even though we might share with you in the government in peace as fellow citizens, these men bring us to a war against each other that is hateful to both gods and men. Know well, however, that even for these men who have just been killed by us, not only you but we, too, have wept many tears.” This was his speech, and the remaining leaders of the Thirty, affected by his words, led those who had marched out with them back to the city. (tr. Robert B. Strassler)

Paidopoieisthai

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Τίνας οὖν, ἔφη, ὑπὸ τίνων εὕροιμεν ἂν μείζω εὐηργετημένους ἢ παῖδας ὑπὸ γονέων; οὓς οἱ γονεῖς ἐκ μὲν οὐκ ὄντων ἐποίησαν εἶναι, τοσαῦτα δὲ καλὰ ἰδεῖν καὶ τοσούτων ἀγαθῶν μετασχεῖν, ὅσα οἱ θεοὶ παρέχουσι τοῖς ἀνθρώποις· ἃ δὴ καὶ οὕτως ἡμῖν δοκεῖ παντὸς ἄξια εἶναι ὥστε πάντες τὸ καταλιπεῖν αὐτὰ πάντων μάλιστα φεύγομεν, καὶ αἱ πόλεις ἐπὶ τοῖς μεγίστοις ἀδικήμασι ζημίαν θάνατον πεποιήκασιν ὡς οὐκ ἂν μείζονος κακοῦ φόβῳ τὴν ἀδικίαν παύσαντες. καὶ μὴν οὐ τῶν γε ἀφροδισίων ἕνεκα παιδοποιεῖσθαι τοὺς ἀνθρώπους ὑπολαμβάνεις, ἐπεὶ τούτου γε τῶν ἀπολυσόντων μεσταὶ μὲν αἱ ὁδοί, μεστὰ δὲ τὰ οἰκήματα. φανεροὶ δ’ ἐσμὲν καὶ σκοπούμενοι ἐξ ὁποίων ἂν γυναικῶν βέλτιστα ἡμῖν τέκνα γένοιτο· αἷς συνελθόντες τεκνοποιούμεθα. καὶ ὁ μέν γε ἀνὴρ τήν τε συντεκνοποιήσουσαν ἑαυτῷ τρέφει καὶ τοῖς μέλλουσιν ἔσεσθαι παισὶ προπαρασκευάζει πάντα, ὅσα ἂν οἴηται συνοίσειν αὐτοῖς πρὸς τὸν βίον, καὶ ταῦτα ὡς ἂν δύνηται πλεῖστα· ἡ δὲ γυνὴ ὑποδεξαμένη τε φέρει τὸ φορτίον τοῦτο, βαρυνομένη τε καὶ κινδυνεύουσα περὶ τοῦ βίου καὶ μεταδιδοῦσα τῆς τροφῆς, ᾗ καὶ αὐτὴ τρέφεται, καὶ σὺν πολλῷ πόνῳ διενεγκοῦσα καὶ τεκοῦσα τρέφει τε καὶ ἐπιμελεῖται, οὔτε προπεπονθυῖα οὐδὲν ἀγαθὸν οὔτε γιγνῶσκον τὸ βρέφος ὑφ’ ὅτου εὖ πάσχει, οὐδὲ σημαίνειν δυνάμενον ὅτου δεῖται, ἀλλ’ αὐτὴ στοχαζομένη τά τε συμφέροντα καὶ τὰ κεχαρισμένα πειρᾶται ἐκπληροῦν, καὶ τρέφει πολὺν χρόνον καὶ ἡμέρας καὶ νυκτὸς ὑπομένουσα πονεῖν, οὐκ εἰδυῖα εἴ τινα τούτων χάριν ἀπολήψεται.
(Xenophon, Mem. 2.2.3-5)

Now what deeper obligation can we find than that of children to their parents? To their parents children owe their existence and their portion of all fair sights and all blessings that the gods bestow on humanity—gifts we prize so highly that all will sacrifice anything rather than lose them; and the reason why governments have made death the penalty for the greatest crimes is that the fear of it is the strongest deterrent against crime. Of course you don’t suppose that lust provokes men to beget children, when the streets and the brothels are full of means to satisfy that? We obviously select for wives the women who will bear us the best children, and then marry them to raise a family. The man supports the woman who is to share with him the duty of parentage and provides for the expected children whatever he thinks will contribute to their benefit in life, and accumulates as much of it as he can. The woman conceives and bears her burden in travail, risking her life, and giving of her own food; and, with much labor, having endured to the end and brought forth her child, she rears and cares for it, although she has not received any good thing, and the baby neither recognizes its benefactress nor can make its wants known to her: still she guesses what is good for it and what it likes, and seeks to supply these things, and rears it for a long season, enduring toil day and night, nothing knowing what return she will get. (tr. Edgar Cardew Marchant, revised by Jeffrey Henderson)

Epimeleiai

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Ἄλλαι δέ τοι, ἔφην ἐγώ, ἴδιαι ἐπιμέλειαι, ὦ γύναι, ἡδεῖαί σοι γίγνονται, ὁπόταν ἀνεπιστήμονα ταλασίας λαβοῦσα ἐπιστήμονα ποιήσῃς καὶ διπλασίου σοι ἀξία γένηται, καὶ ὁπόταν ἀνεπιστήμονα ταμιείας καὶ διακονίας παραλαβοῦσα ἐπιστήμονα καὶ πιστὴν καὶ διακονικὴν ποιησαμένη παντὸς ἀξίαν ἔχῃς, καὶ ὁπόταν τοὺς μὲν σώφρονάς τε καὶ ὠφελίμους τῷ σῷ οἴκῳ ἐξῇ σοι εὖ ποιῆσαι, ἐὰν δέ τις πονηρὸς φαίνηται, ἐξῇ σοι κολάσαι· τὸ δὲ πάντων ἥδιστον, ἐὰν βελτίων ἐμοῦ φανῇς, καὶ ἐμὲ σὸν θεράποντα ποιήσῃ, καὶ μὴ δέῃ σε φοβεῖσθαι μὴ προϊούσης τῆς ἡλικίας ἀτιμοτέρα ἐν τῷ οἴκῳ γένῃ, ἀλλὰ πιστεύῃς ὅτι πρεσβυτέρα γιγνομένη ὅσῳ ἂν καὶ ἐμοὶ κοινωνὸς καὶ παισὶν οἴκου φύλαξ ἀμείνων γίγνῃ, τοσούτῳ καὶ τιμιωτέρα ἐν τῷ οἴκῳ ἔσει. τὰ γὰρ καλά τε κἀγαθά, ἐγὼ ἔφην, οὐ διὰ τὰς ὡραιότητας, ἀλλὰ διὰ τὰς ἀρετὰς εἰς τὸν βίον τοῖς ἀνθρώποις ἐπαύξεται.
(Xenophon, Oec. 7.41-43)

But I assure you, wife, there are other duties particular to you that are pleasant to perform: to teach spinning to a slave who had no knowledge of it when you received her, and to double her value to you: to take in hand a girl who is ignorant of housekeeping and service, and after teaching her and making her trustworthy and serviceable to end up with someone invaluable: to have the power of rewarding the well-behaved and useful members of your household and of punishing anyone who turns out to be bad. But the most pleasant experience of all is to prove yourself better than I am, to make me your servant; and so far from having reason to fear that as you grow older you may be less honored in the household, to feel confident that with advancing years, the better partner you prove to me and the better guardian of the estate for our children, the greater will be the honor paid to you in the household. For it is not because of youthful charms that the sum of things good and beautiful in human life is increased, but through practice of the virtues. (tr. Edgar Cardew Marchant, revised by Jeffrey Henderson)

Gelōtopoios

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Ἐκεῖνοι μὲν οὖν σιωπῇ ἐδείπνουν, ὥσπερ τοῦτο ἐπιτεταγμένον αὐτοῖς ὑπὸ κρείττονός τινος. Φίλιππος δ’ ὁ γελωτοποιὸς κρούσας τὴν θύραν εἶπε τῷ ὑπακούσαντι εἰσαγγεῖλαι ὅστις τε εἴη καὶ δι’ ὅ τι κατάγεσθαι βούλοιτο, συνεσκευασμένος τε παρεῖναι ἔφη πάντα τὰ ἐπιτήδεια ὥστε δειπνεῖν τἀλλότρια, καὶ τὸν παῖδα δὲ ἔφη πάνυ πιέζεσθαι διά τε τὸ φέρειν μηδὲν καὶ διὰ τὸ ἀνάριστον εἶναι. ὁ οὖν Καλλίας ἀκούσας ταῦτα εἶπεν· “ἀλλὰ μέντοι, ὦ ἄνδρες, αἰσχρὸν στέγης γε φθονῆσαι· εἰσίτω οὖν.” καὶ ἅμα ἀπέβλεψεν εἰς τὸν Αὐτόλυκον, δῆλον ὅτι ἐπισκοπῶν τί ἐκείνῳ δόξειε τὸ σκῶμμα εἶναι. ὁ δὲ στὰς ἐπὶ τῷ ἀνδρῶνι ἔνθα τὸ δεῖπνον ἦν εἶπεν· “ὅτι μὲν γελωτοποιός εἰμι ἴστε πάντες· ἥκω δὲ προθύμως νομίσας γελοιότερον εἶναι τὸ ἄκλητον ἢ τὸ κεκλημένον ἐλθεῖν ἐπὶ τὸ δεῖπνον.” “κατακλίνου τοίνυν,” ἔφη ὁ Καλλίας· “καὶ γὰρ οἱ παρόντες σπουδῆς μέν, ὡς ὁρᾷς, μεστοί, γέλωτος δὲ ἴσως ἐνδεέστεροι.” δειπνούντων δὲ αὐτῶν ὁ Φίλιππος γελοῖόν τι εὐθὺς ἐπεχείρει λέγειν, ἵνα δὴ ἐπιτελοίη ὧνπερ ἕνεκα ἐκαλεῖτο ἑκάστοτε ἐπὶ τὰ δεῖπνα. ὡς δ’ οὐκ ἐκίνησε γέλωτα, τότε μὲν ἀχθεσθεὶς φανερὸς ἐγένετο. αὖθις δ’ ὀλίγον ὕστερον ἄλλο τι γελοῖον ἐβούλετο λέγειν. ὡς δὲ οὐδὲ τότε ἐγέλασαν ἐπ’ αὐτῷ, ἐν τῷ μεταξὺ παυσάμενος τοῦ δείπνου συγκαλυψάμενος κατέκειτο. καὶ ὁ Καλλίας, “τί τοῦτ’,” ἔφη, “ὦ Φίλιππε; ἀλλ’ ἢ ὀδύνη σε εἴληφε;” καὶ ὃς ἀναστενάξας εἶπε· “ναὶ μὰ Δί’,” ἔφη, “ὦ Καλλία, μεγάλη γε· ἐπεὶ γὰρ γέλως ἐξ ἀνθρώπων ἀπόλωλεν, ἔρρει τὰ ἐμὰ πράγματα. πρόσθεν μὲν γὰρ τούτου ἕνεκα ἐκαλούμην ἐπὶ τὰ δεῖπνα, ἵνα εὐφραίνοιντο οἱ συνόντες δι’ ἐμὲ γελῶντες· νῦν δὲ τίνος ἕνεκα καὶ καλεῖ μέ τις; οὔτε γὰρ ἔγωγε σπουδάσαι ἂν δυναίμην μᾶλλον ἤπερ ἀθάνατος γενέσθαι, οὔτε μὴν ὡς ἀντικληθησόμενος καλεῖ μέ τις, ἐπεὶ πάντες ἴσασιν ὅτι ἀρχὴν οὐδὲ νομίζεται εἰς τὴν ἐμὴν οἰκίαν δεῖπνον προσφέρεσθαι.” καὶ ἅμα λέγων ταῦτα ἀπεμύττετό τε καὶ τῇ φωνῇ σαφῶς κλαίειν ἐφαίνετο. πάντες μὲν οὖν παρεμυθοῦντό τε αὐτὸν ὡς αὖθις γελασόμενοι καὶ δειπνεῖν ἐκέλευον, Κριτόβουλος δὲ καὶ ἐξεκάγχασεν ἐπὶ τῷ οἰκτισμῷ αὐτοῦ. ὁ δ’ ὡς ᾔσθετο τοῦ γέλωτος, ἀνεκαλύψατό τε καὶ τῇ ψυχῇ παρακελευσάμενος θαρρεῖν, ὅτι ἔσονται συμβολαί, πάλιν ἐδείπνει.”
(Xenophon, Symp. 1.11-16)

The company, then, were feasting in silence, as though at the command of some greater authority, when Philip the comedian knocked at the door and told the porter to announce who he was and why he desired to be admitted; he declared that with regard to food he had come fully equipped with everything needed to dine at someone else’s expense, and that his servant was in great distress at having no loadto carry and at having had no lunch. Hearing this, Callias said, “Well, gentlemen, we can’t decently begrudge him at the least the shelter of our roof; so let him come in.” At the same time he cast a glance at Autolycus, obviously trying to make out what he had thought of the joke. But Philip, standing at the threshold of the men’s hall where the banquet was served, announced: “You all know that I am a comedian; and so I’ve come here in the firm belief that it’s funnier to come to your dinner uninvited than invited.” “Well, then,” said Callias, “take a seat; for the guests, though well fed, as you can see, on seriousness, are perhaps rather ill supplied with laughter.” No sooner were they engaged in their dinner than Philip tried making a joke, with a view to rendering the service that secured him a dinner engagement every time; but when he failed to get a laugh he was visibly annoyed. A little later he tried another joke; but when they would not laugh at it this time either, he stopped in the middle of his dinner, covered his head with his cloak, and stretched out on his couch. “What’s the matter, Philip?” Callias asked. “Are you in pain?” Philip replied with a groan, “Zeus yes, Callias, severe pain; for since laughter has perished from the world, my business is ruined. For in times past, the reason I got invitations to dinner was because I might arouse laughter among the guests and put them in a good mood; but why will anyone want to invite me now? For I could no more turn serious than I could become immortal; and certainly no one will invite me in hope of a return invitation, since every one knows it’s simply never been customary at my house even to send out for dinner.” As he said this, he wiped his nose, and to judge by the sound, he was evidently weeping. All tried to comfort him with the promise that they would laugh next time, and urged him to eat; and Critobulus actually burst into a guffaw at his display of self-pity. The moment Philip heard the laughter he uncovered his head, and exhorting his spirit to be of good courage—there will be contributions!*—he fell to eating again.

* Punning on symbolai, which can mean hostile encounters, agreed terms, and potluck contributions (in this case, jokes from him, laughter from the guests, food from the host).

(tr. Edgar Cardew Marchant & Otis Johnson Todd, revised by Jeffrey Henderson, with his note)

Philōn

socrates1

Ἤκουσα δέ ποτε αὐτοῦ καὶ περὶ φίλων διαλεγομένου, ἐξ ὧν ἔμοιγε ἐδόκει μάλιστ’ ἄν τις ὠφελεῖσθαι πρὸς φίλων κτῆσίν τε καὶ χρείαν. τοῦτο μὲν γὰρ δὴ πολλῶν ἔφη ἀκούειν, ὡς πάντων κτημάτων κράτιστον ἂν εἴη φίλος σαφὴς καὶ ἀγαθός· ἐπιμελομένους δὲ παντὸς μᾶλλον ὁρᾶν ἔφη τοὺς πολλοὺς ἢ φίλων κτήσεως. καὶ γὰρ οἰκίας καὶ ἀγροὺς καὶ ἀνδράποδα καὶ βοσκήματα καὶ σκεύη κτωμένους τε ἐπιμελῶς ὁρᾶν ἔφη καὶ τὰ ὄντα σῴζειν πειρωμένους, φίλον δέ, ὃ μέγιστον ἀγαθὸν εἶναί φασιν, ὁρᾶν ἔφη τοὺς πολλοὺς οὔτε ὅπως κτήσωνται φροντίζοντας οὔτε ὅπως οἱ ὄντες αὐτοῖς σῴζωνται. ἀλλὰ καὶ καμνόντων φίλων τε καὶ οἰκετῶν ὁρᾶν τινας ἔφη τοῖς μὲν οἰκέταις καὶ ἰατροὺς εἰσάγοντας καὶ τἆλλα τὰ πρὸς ὑγίειαν ἐπιμελῶς παρασκευάζοντας, τῶν δὲ φίλων ὀλιγωροῦντας, ἀποθανόντων τε ἀμφοτέρων ἐπὶ μὲν τοῖς οἰκέταις ἀχθομένους τε καὶ ζημίαν ἡγουμένους, ἐπὶ δὲ τοῖς φίλοις οὐδὲν οἰομένους ἐλαττοῦσθαι, καὶ τῶν μὲν ἄλλων κτημάτων οὐδὲν ἐῶντας ἀθεράπευτον οὐδ᾽ ἀνεπίσκεπτον, τῶν δὲ φίλων ἐπιμελείας δεομένων ἀμελοῦντας. ἔτι δὲ πρὸς τούτοις ὁρᾶν ἔφη τοὺς πολλοὺς τῶν μὲν ἄλλων κτημάτων καὶ πάνυ πολλῶν αὐτοῖς ὄντων, τὸ πλῆθος εἰδότας, τῶν δὲ φίλων, ὀλίγων ὄντων οὐ μόνον τὸ πλῆθος ἀγνοοῦντας, ἀλλὰ καὶ τοῖς πυνθανομένοις τοῦτο καταλέγειν ἐγχειρήσαντας οὓς ἐν τοῖς φίλοις ἔθεσαν, πάλιν τούτους ἀνατίθεσθαι· τοσοῦτον αὐτοὺς τῶν φίλων φροντίζειν.
(Xenophon, Mem. 4.1-4)

Again, I once heard a conversation of his* about friendship that I thought likely to be of great help in acquiring and making use of friends. For he said that he often heard it stated that of all possessions the most precious is a good and sincere friend. “And yet,” he said, “there is no transaction most men are so careless about as the acquisition of friends. For I find that they are careful about getting houses and lands and slaves and cattle and furniture, and anxious to keep what they have; but though they claim that a friend is the greatest blessing, I find that most men take no thought how to get new friends or how to keep their old ones. Indeed, if one of their friends and one of their servants get sick at the same time, I find that some call in the doctor to attend the servant and are careful to provide everything that may contribute to his recovery, whereas they pay no attention to the friend. In the event that both die, they are annoyed at losing the servant and consider it a loss, but don’t feel that the death of the friend matters in the least. And though none of their other possessions is uncared for and unconsidered, they neglect their friends’ need of attention. And besides all this, I find that most men know the number of their other possessions, however great it may be, yet cannot tell the number of their friends, few as they are, and if asked to try to make a list they will insert names and presently remove them. So much for the thought they give to their friends!

* i.e. Socrates’.

(tr. Edgar Cardew Marchant & Otis Johnson Todd, revised by Jeffrey Henderson)