Toiouton

Σχολαστικῷ τις ἀπαντήσας εἶπεν· “ὁ δοῦλος, ὃν ἐπώλησάς μοι, ἀπέθανε.” – “μὰ τοὺς θεούς,” ἔφη, “παρ’ ἐμοὶ ὅτε ἦν, τοιοῦτον οὐδὲν ἐποίησεν.”
(Philogelos 18)

A man goes up to a student dunce and says, ‘The slave you sold me died.’ ‘By the gods,’ counters the dunce, ‘when he was with me, he never did any such thing!’ (tr. William Berg)